Patrick Cassels 100% For Actual!

Sep 29

collegehumor:

Thanks to all the CollegeHumor fans and subscribers. We couldn’t have done this without you because that would be physically impossible. 
CollegeHumor’s YouTube Channel 

- 8,003,342 subscribers
- 2,940,700,059 views


HOORAY!

collegehumor:

Thanks to all the CollegeHumor fans and subscribers. We couldn’t have done this without you because that would be physically impossible. 

CollegeHumor’s YouTube Channel 

- 8,003,342 subscribers

- 2,940,700,059 views

HOORAY!

collegehumor:

CollegeHumor is LIVE again in Los Angeles. Get your tickets here. Hosted by CH’s Pat Cassels and Adam Conover and starring some of the best comedic talent in the LA area. 
The show is Tuesday Oct, 7 - More info here!

collegehumor:

CollegeHumor is LIVE again in Los Angeles. Get your tickets hereHosted by CH’s Pat Cassels and Adam Conover and starring some of the best comedic talent in the LA area. 

The show is Tuesday Oct, 7 - More info here!

"Well Dave, uh, I just think the Foo Fighters could use a new member." (Pulls out and tunes guitar.)

"Well Dave, uh, I just think the Foo Fighters could use a new member." (Pulls out and tunes guitar.)

Sep 28

Clooney Wedding Program

I can now reveal that I was a guest at George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin’s secret, star-studded wedding. Here’s what you “normals” missed. Jealous?

8pm - Ceremony.

9pm - Five course banquet provided by Smuckers Uncrustables.

10pm - Groomsmen speeches: Jerry Sandusky, Phil Spector, The Beltway Sniper, Matt Damon.

11pm - Bride and Groom cut the cake (lemon-pimento cake with gluten-free icing and human feces).

12am - George Clooney tries playing the spoons on his thigh for the first time ever.

1am - He’ll get it. Just… just stay seated. It’s gonna be great.

2am - Group photos.

3am - Busses leave to return guests to Target parking lot where everyone left their cars.

Sep 27

“I’ll shut you down John” — I remember this line from “Jurassic Park” better than any dinosaur attack.

(Source: hark.com)

Jay Z = Ralph Kramden (Chubby Brooklynite preoccupied with success)

Beyonce = Alice Kramden (Strong-willed wife; good with words)

Kanye West = Norton (Weird best friend)

Kim Kardashian = Trixie (Underdeveloped character)

Sep 26

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